you hold me right there right now

so the man with the plan called just to tell me he loved me and he was sorry for being such an ass all the time. that he knows i should just walk away and never look back, but that i love him too much. told me he was goign to try harder to be the man i deserve and that he hopes all my dreams get to come true too. i almsot fell tot he floor i was so shocked. here i have been waiting for the next blow, the other shoe to fall and he comes out with that. he also apologized for not gettign me anythign for v-day. no big worry there but i dunno it kind hurt, because h had left the day before. but i'm under the impression he will one up valentines when he comes home. we're goign back to padre for our 3 year anniversary, his idea not mine. i'm so excited like you have no idea. The man i married is no longer a figmant of my imagination, hes now the man i'm married to. lot of shit has hit the fan the past few days..what with a man i trusted with my everything lied to me and used his career to cover it up..guess i know who my true friends are now...even if i never see any of them and hardly talk to them anymore. they are still true. but i digress...my husband loves me, all of me. i hope he keeps smoking whatever he's smoking, because i like this turn around in him. planning for down the road and listening to what i have to say and not picking a fight every time we butt heads. so excited...i'm blathering now...in other news keegan is still huge...but still not walking. he is sick again...while on antibiotics so i'm worried about that. hopefully its jsut a bug and he'll be fine tomorrow. time to start hunting down a smaller daycare. he came home with a floor scratch on his face and elbows,but when i picked him up no one could tell me what happened....that made me angry. then today i had to pick him up because he had a fever, and there were flies int eh room where he usually is...flying around the sippy cups. and the floors are filthy..he crawls so he's going through all his clothes in one day. i dunno. hopefully there is an opening at the day care across from the school, even if it means less hours at work or whatever. not keeping him at the other place past the end of semester if i can help it...blarg. lot longer than i thought it would be...

anyway

Do you hear me,
I'm talking to you
Across the water across the deep blue ocean
Under the open sky, oh my, baby I'm trying


Boy I hear you in my dreams
I feel your whisper across the sea
I keep you with me in my heart
You make it easier when life gets hard


I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again